Okay. Deep Breath.
So after finding myself stressed and a little lost at school for the past couple of weeks, I came home for the weekend. I was expecting a relaxing weekend of driving and photography and seeing some good friends, and I was pretty pumped. Then I got home, and everything fell to pieces.
It started out well enough. My dog greeted me at the door and jumped all over the place and immediately upon stepping foot into the study my brother started showing me Lonely Island videos and we were actually getting along for once. I took my brother and his friends shopping since I had to get some things for THON and it was shockingly fun (one of them wore his morphsuit. What?). We came home and I sorted through some old THON pictures and talked to my dad and my brother and everything was fine. And then I don’t even remember how it happened but the bickering began and soon my mom and I were screaming at each other and saying terrible things and my dad was telling us both to stop and I started crying and then felt stupid for crying. My mom told me to get out and I told her to leave me alone and it was all a big mess. And when my mom and I finally stopped fighting she and my dad started fighting about money and jobs and change and everything nobody likes to think about. So now my mom is in a huff and my dad’s sleeping in the guest room and things just suck.
BUT. Yes, thankfully, there’s a but.
So after all of this dramatic shit happened, I calmed myself down and went upstairs to my room and started watching Grey’s Anatomy and surfing the internet so I could forget about everything. But after a while I couldn’t concentrate anymore because I just kept going back to how it felt like everything was going wrong at once and it was getting to be too much. At this point it was about 2AM and I was on the verge of tears and I didn’t even know what to do except sit there stewing in all of this hatred and anger.
Then, completely out of the blue, one of my friends Facebook messaged me and said “So… I might have lied.” I obviously asked what he was talking about. He told me “This is for you if you have yet to see my status. I said the only people in this world I like are those found in books.” And then he asked me if I was alright. I know that it’s normal, that friends are supposed to ask you if you’re alright. But this kid normally goes to bed around 11 every night, and it was 2 in the morning. And he just randomly messaged me asking if I was alright, at exactly the right time. So I’m noting the wonderful timing.
Anyways, I told him that honestly, no, everything wasn’t alright. And I explained everything to him (which I probably would not have normally done). After about 30 seconds, he said “Did you go for a drive? You should go for a drive.” And I just looked at my computer and smiled. Because he knew exactly what I needed before I even knew it. At times like these when I’m having all of these friendship issues and dramatic situations, I sometimes tend to forget about all of the wonderful and attentive and supportive friends that I still have. So although some things are rocky right now, I’ve been reminded that I still have people who care about me and help me when I’m down, and I don’t know what I’d do without them.
I think I’ll go for a drive now.
